Thursday, July 29, 2010

I Don't Know.

"...every thought pretends it matters so much." -Eckhart Tolle
"An unquestioned mind is the world of suffering. There's only one thought to question: the one appearing now." -Byron Katie

I've recently been reading some books and material by this Byron Katie woman, and find her "work" to be extremely fascinating. She talks about how the nature of the human mind, when left unquestioned, is to think that it understands everything already. She also says that quite often, the mind's summaries, judgments, and assumptions about the world, people, and things are false or misled.
Anyways, I've really come to appreciate the "don't know" state of mind. I've also fallen in love with questions and the amazing shifting power they can have on a person's perceptions and personal reality.
For example, I was exhausted at work today (or that was the thought in my head at least). "I'm exhausted." So I questioned the thought. Is it true? Can I absolutely know that it's exhaustion that I'm feeling? Who would I be without this thought? And the strangest thing happened. As soon as my mind let go of the thought: "I'm exhausted," I felt a giant increase in my energy. The thought would come back and I'd feel tired again. Then I'd question it, and my energy came back. It was pretty cool to notice.
There's a sweet freedom in not-knowing. Almost an innocence, like a baby. Babies' minds are empty, and they have an entire world to discover. Us older people just think we understand the world, because we've lived in it a few more years. There's always another way of looking at something. Always. With this realization, anything negative loses its power, or is almost dispelled as an illusion. I'm sad: Is it true? Could it be something else? Love maybe? Life becomes more a game of belief; when the negative is questioned, only positive remains. Whoever said ignorance was bliss might have been onto something. Or maybe I'm crazy, ha I honestly couldn't tell you.
"Questioning breaks open the stagnant, hardened shells of the present, opening up options to be explored." -Fran Peavey

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